Beta
×

Welcome to the Slashdot Beta site -- learn more here. Use the link in the footer or click here to return to the Classic version of Slashdot.

Thank you!

Before you choose to head back to the Classic look of the site, we'd appreciate it if you share your thoughts on the Beta; your feedback is what drives our ongoing development.

Beta is different and we value you taking the time to try it out. Please take a look at the changes we've made in Beta and  learn more about it. Thanks for reading, and for making the site better!

John McAfee Triggers the Ultimate False Positive

timothy posted 1 year,20 days | from the we-will-miss-him-but-celebrate-his-life dept.

It's funny.  Laugh. 47

Barence writes "The wild man of antivirus software, John McAfee, has been forced to deny reports of his own death. Internet reports circulating last night claimed the hard-living security software entrepreneur had died after one too many drink and drugs sessions. However, McAfee has taken to his Twitter account in the past few hours to assure everyone that he's still alive, and hasn't mislaid his sense of humour.'"I felt great when I went to bed last night. I had such great plans,' tweeted McAfee, alongside a link to a report — now hastily withdrawn — that claimed he had died from an overdose."

cancel ×

47 comments

Sorry! There are no comments related to the filter you selected.

Yeah... (3, Funny)

cayenne8 (626475) | 1 year,20 days | (#44806797)

...meth is a hell of a drug....

Re:Yeah... (1)

Bob_Who (926234) | 1 year,20 days | (#44806917)

....So is piles of money....

Re:Yeah... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807111)

Yeah, like you would turn it down Mr. Self-righteous Jerk. Oooooo even money/capitalism.

Re:Yeah... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807247)

Him, money? It gone.

Re:Yeah... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807279)

Why the hell would anyone trust a tweet over a cryptographically signed message?

Re:Yeah... (2)

bobbied (2522392) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807375)

Why the hell would anyone trust a tweet over a cryptographically signed message?

Better ask the NSA that one... Oh wait, you did...

Re: Yeah... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44810051)

ROFL!... it's good... wait, no it's bad.

Re:Yeah... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44811395)

Why the hell would anyone trust a tweet over a cryptographically signed message?

Sweet ass job: Working for the U.S.; getting government pay and benefits; impersonating the guy you terminated.

Re:Yeah... (1)

FuzzNugget (2840687) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807507)

I thought his thing was butt chugging ... or something

Why do we care again? (0, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44806931)

Other than aspiring to be rich doucehbags too, why do we give a fuck about what McAfee does again?

His software was shit, and now he's a rich idiot who does stupid things.

I'm tired of hearing about this fucking idiot.

Re:Why do we care again? (0, Flamebait)

Dunbal (464142) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807103)

He's also another example of an American fugitive hiding from justice. Funny how Americans kick and scream and intervene in other countries until their authorities give up their own citizens to America to face "terror related charges" like copyright infringement, or making a huge deal out of Snowden and how Russia "slapped the US in the face" by taking him in, but they seem to have no trouble harboring the likes of McAfee, Knox, Watson, all of whom are wanted by Interpol.

Re:Why do we care again? (0, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807767)

Knox? As in Amanda Knox? The girl who got railroaded by an Italian court? Then had her conviction overturned by a higher court? Then was going to be retried? Yeah, that's a real fugitive there.

You see, under American law, there's this "no double jeopardy" thing. It's actually part of the constitution. So Interpol can "want" all it wants, but the US government is never going to extradite Amanda Knox for a double-jeopardy case. It's actually illegal for them to do so. Funny, the US government refusing to break its own laws. Yeah, I know. Rare these days.

Also, this answers the "does the Constitution trump treaties?" question with a big, fat "yes!"

Whatever. Fuck Italy.

Re:Why do we care again? (1)

Dunbal (464142) | 1 year,20 days | (#44813269)

American law doesn't apply in Italy. Yet Americans seem to think their laws apply all over the world, like Sweden, Australia, New Zealand, etc. And no actually, no constitution of any country overrides international law. But we already know that the United States routinely breaks international law when it suits them.

Re:Why do we care again? (1)

kwbauer (1677400) | 1 year,20 days | (#44813835)

But Italy let Knox go and she came home to the US. Now Italy decided it wanted to retry her for the same crime which is not kosher in the US. That is what the GP was talking about. Italy had her and didn't convict. The US court system frowns upon endlessly trying an individual over and over for the same act.

Now, if Italy can find some other corpse that Amanda Knox supposedly created, the US would most likely turn her over fairly quickly.

Re: Why do we care again? (2)

ImaLamer (260199) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807807)

Wait, lets clear up one thing; Russians are wanted worldwide for more than copyright infringement. Globally that is actually worth fighting, America's exports are dying and entertainment is still a viable export. And it's not just digital goods, it's violation of trademarks (counterfeit goods, which even private goods, have fallen under the realm of the Secret Service for it's entire existence).

But back to my original point, credit card theft and computer assisted fraud is alive and well around the globe and Russians lead the charge. Money, sometimes cash from checking accounts is being siphoned into Russian (and other) banks and being taken from innocent people - is this not worth pursuing?

Snowden is entirely another matter, but given the Russian state written news program RT and their constant American bashing I can't believe for a second they want to just keep Snowden safe. They have their own motives. It's to smear America worldwide. That thought can exist separately from the idea that what Snowden is doing is "good". Russia isn't helping Americans find out the truth about their government, they are helping themselves. The way the leaks help you is a secondary thought to Putin. He doesn't care, just look at their own brutality in Russia, how they treat their own free-speaking patriots.

Re: Why do we care again? (1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44810367)

Wait, lets clear up one thing; Russians are wanted worldwide for more than copyright infringement. Globally that is actually worth fighting, America's exports are dying and entertainment is still a viable export.

If by dying you mean continuing an upwards trend then yes, America's exports are dying:

http://www.worldsrichestcountries.com/top_us_exports.html [worldsrich...ntries.com]

http://bea.gov/newsreleases/international/trade/2013/pdf/trad1212.pdf [bea.gov]

Some people find this difficult to believe, but the U.S. retains a significant manufacturing base - hi-tech and more humdrum products. Entertainment is a pretty small percentage of exports and GDP.

Re:Why do we care again? (1)

amiga3D (567632) | 1 year,20 days | (#44808909)

It's common enough. Everyone prefers their own legal system over a foreign one. Plenty of people flee the US to avoid prosecution and hide from Interpol. If other countries give up their citizens to the US that is between them and their government. I expect mine to protect me unless it's sure that I'll get a fair shake.

Re:Why do we care again? (1)

TheSeatOfMyPants (2645007) | 1 year,20 days | (#44816009)

Funny how Americans kick and scream and intervene in other countries until their authorities give up their own citizens to America to face "terror related charges" like copyright infringement ...

No, our clusterfuck of a government harasses other nations until they turn their citizens over. You might notice that comments here (and on similar forums with reasonably intelligent/aware people) by actual everyday Americans show most of us not only strongly disagree with the practice, a hell of a lot of us cheer on countries that tell our government to shove its bullying up its flabby old ass.

Re:Why do we care again? (2)

lxs (131946) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807121)

I can't speak for everybody but for me it's entertaining to see rich idiots do stupid shit. It's not very mature or sophisticated of me I know but it gets me through the day.

Need Confirmation (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44806971)

With all that I have read, I find it hard to believe that he ever existed. I am quite sure that he could never be reproduced, so his existence will remain anecdotal.

Re: Need Confirmation (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44809643)

Cock muncher

I guess the covered-up assassination is off. (2)

intermodal (534361) | 1 year,20 days | (#44806975)

Can't pull the same plan twice on the same guy in this age of media leaking things prematurely.

He does have a reputation... (5, Funny)

thesandbender (911391) | 1 year,20 days | (#44806981)

For being almost impossible to completely uninstall.

Re:He does have a reputation... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807125)

So we should send a meteor toward Earth so that we can start over again (reformat OS).

Re:He does have a reputation... (1)

NJRoadfan (1254248) | 1 year,20 days | (#44809589)

Belize managed to get rid of him. Shortly after, ads touting the benefits of buying real estate in Belize started airing on TV here in the USA. Didn't see his house in the ad though.

Belize ads (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44812585)

We have a similar ad targeting Canadians here as well.. and I recognize the residence at the end of the ad from a CNBC investigation report - possibly similar to Gregory Faul's place?

The Real Overdose (2)

twmcneil (942300) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807031)

I may die of an overdose of John McAfee stories.

Re:The Real Overdose (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807301)

God, I hope so.

Re:The Real Overdose (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44809799)

I hope that too! I think histories about him are funny!

Free Press (0, Troll)

Infiniti2000 (1720222) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807105)

All this story does is give free press to a raving lunatic who should probably be locked up for murder and drug trafficking. At a minimum, the cases against him should be tried.

Re:Free Press (1)

barista (587936) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807267)

Looking at most free press outlets these days, it seems like raving lunatics are a growing industry. So he'll probably be given a TV show, or something.

Re:Free Press (1, Funny)

MrKaos (858439) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807593)

he'll probably be given a TV show, or something.

Has anyone seen "The Addams Family"?

  • They're creepy and they're kooky,
  • Mysterious and spooky,
  • They're all together ooky,
  • The McAffe Family.
  • Their house is a museum
  • Where people come to see 'em
  • They really are a scream
  • The McAffe Family.
  • (Neat)
  • (Sweet)
  • (Petite)
  • So get a witches shawl on
  • A broomstick you can crawl on
  • We're gonna pay a call on
  • The McAffe Family.

Re:Free Press (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44808107)

the president?

Who? (0)

davidmcg (796487) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807147)

who? ...

Ultimate no-news item (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44807215)

So he's not dead; great news for him.

Can we please move along?

Look at the source (3, Funny)

Minwee (522556) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807311)

This is McAfee. Can we trust him when he says he isn't dead?

Re:Look at the source (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44809105)

Right. I wouldn't trust someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder even if there was a doctor proclaiming his alive and alertness and there was video proof.

What has John McAfee done for me recently?!!! (1)

Thud457 (234763) | 1 year,20 days | (#44809277)

John, I am disappoint, you are slacking off on the crazy.

Meanwhile, Charlie Sheen hunts manbearpig in Alaska! [cryptomundo.com] [1] Top that, John, if you can.



[1] this is a real thing.[2]
[2] well the trip to Alaska to hunt for the Kushtaka.[3]
[3] Kushtaka are arguably not real.[4]
[4] But more likely real than John McAfee. Or Charlie Sheen.

Re:Look at the source (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,18 days | (#44828657)

This. He should be forced to take a polygraph.

Death wanted to take him... (1)

MrKaos (858439) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807401)

But no one else knew how to get McAfee's software of his machine.

The reports of my death... (1)

bobbied (2522392) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807443)

Dear World,

Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated

John

P.S. Unless of course the effects of all these drugs and alcohol are what is greatly exaggerated.

Maybe I just THINK I'm dead...

Ultimate False Positive? (3, Funny)

tinkerton (199273) | 1 year,20 days | (#44807927)

That reminds me, someone should write a virus that when an antivirus detects it and displays the messagebox "virus removed", the virus shows an additional messagebox saying "Reports claiming this virus' removal have been greatly exaggerated."

If only... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44808297)

He would do a great service to the world if he died and took his company with him.

How do we know.. (1)

Virtucon (127420) | 1 year,20 days | (#44810247)

That he is John McAfee? I mean he could be a facsimile that appeared on night in a large green pea pod while the real John was consumed and left as an empty husk somewhere in Central America?

Why I stopped using digital condoms (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,20 days | (#44810651)

1. McAfee just like any other antivirus program slows down a computer up to 60%, that's worse than any virus I've ever gotten back in the day.
2. Subscribing for the latest definitions makes sense but only if having the definitions could uninstall the virus
3. You can easily catch viruses without the need of an antivirus, even rootkits can be detected with relative ease. Just be sure you look for them before restarting your computer.
4. When was the last time anyone who's computer savvy had a virus of some sort? I get that some torrents have malware in it but besides that it's really, really hard to get them.
5. Uninstalling an antivirus application will probably lead into some blue-screen complication or it just doesn't install properly even with their customized emergency uninstallers. It's basically a virus in itself.
6. Setting manual updates and disabled notifications doesn't work after an update. It's always a constant battle with their preferences override.
7. False-positives exist everywhere, especially if you're developing software, it'll catch your program as you're building it. Stupid!
8. The price of an antivirus subscription is way too high, and for something that doesn't really work in the first place it's pretty much a scam.
9. I wish i could make it up to 10
10. I'm sure there are other reasons.

One more on the todo (1)

dtfinch (661405) | 1 year,20 days | (#44812459)

I need to set up a dead man's switch that posts denials of my demise.

Check for New Comments
Slashdot Login

Need an Account?

Forgot your password?